A talent scout is walking down the street and comes across a man and his dog. The little dog is singing. He has a lovely voice and the talent scout says, “Come to my office. I want to sign you and this marvelous dog to a contract. This dog can make us both rich.” The ...
On Monday Fred, an old country farmer, bought a mule from Luke, another old farmer, for $100. Luke promised to deliver the mule the next day. On Tuesday Luke drove up and said, “Sorry, Fred, but I have some bad news. The mule died.” Fred: Well, then, just give me my money back. Luke: Can’t ...
Two blondes went to the pound where each adopted a puppy. The joy of their new best friend was quickly overshadowed when they got home and the first blonde said, “I think we’re in trouble, how are we going to tell them apart?” This lead to several hours of concentration until finally, the second blonde ...
This blonde decides one day that she is sick and tired of all the blonde jokes and how all blondes are perceived as stupid, so she decides to show her husband that blondes really are smart. While her husband is off at work, she decides that she is going to paint a couple of rooms ...
A blonde woman was standing at the pop machine; she put in her money and pressed the Coke button and out came a can of Coke. She looked at it and smiled. She took out a dollar, put it in the pop machine pressed the 7Up button and out came a can of 7Up. She ...
A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time. She wanted to see the Capitol Building. Unfortunately, she couldn’t find it, so she asked a police officer how to get there. “Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol Building?” The officer replied, “Wait here at this bus stop for the number ...
A blonde, needed some extra cash, so she begged her friend at the highway department for a job – any job at all. “Sure,” he said. “I always have job openings to paint the lines down the center of the roads. Would you be interested in painting stripes?” The blonde agreed and began working immediately. ...
A blonde made several attempts to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems finding a buyer because the car had 340,000 miles on it. She discussed her problem with a brunette that she worked with at a bar. The brunette suggested, “There may be a chance to sell that car easier, ...
A bartender is sitting behind the bar on a typical day, when the door bursts open and in come nine exuberant blondes. They come up to the bar, order five bottles of champagne and ten glasses, take their order over and sit down at a large table. The corks are popped, the glasses filled and ...
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, “Those are deer tracks.” The second blonde said, “No, those are elk tracks.” The third blonde said, “You’re both wrong, those are moose tracks.” The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them. ...