A blonde man lived on a farm. He didn’t get many visitors, so a friend went to see him. When the friend got there, the blonde was standing stiff as a board, out in the middle of the cow pasture. The friend yelled out to him, and asked what he was doing standing out there ...
A blonde had just gotten a new sports car and was out for a drive when she cut off a truck driver. He motioned for her to pull over. When she did, he got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a circle on the road and ...
Three blondes got together to change a light bulb. Then one of them calls 911. Blonde: “We need help. We’re three blondes changing a light bulb.” Operator: “Hmmmmm. You put in a fresh bulb?” Blonde: “Yes.” Operator: “The power in the house in on?” Blonde: “Of course.” Operator: “And the switch is on?” Blonde: “Yes, ...
There were three women stranded on an island, a brunette, a redhead, and a blonde. The brunette looked over the water to the mainland and estimated about 20 miles to shore. So she announced, “I’m going to try to swim to shore.” So she swam out five miles, and got really tired. She swam out ...
Three blondes are sitting by the side of a river holding fishing poles with the lines in the water. A Game Warden comes up behind them, taps them on the shoulder and says, “Excuse me, ladies, I’d like to see your fishing licenses.” “We don’t have any,” replied the first blonde. “Well, if you’re going ...
A blonde is terribly overweight, so her doctor put her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least 5 pounds.” When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by ...
Jane, a young blonde woman, was seen going into the woods with a small package and a large bird cage. She was gone several days, but finally she returned. Her friend, Susan, never saw Jane looking so sad. “Heard you went off in the woods for a couple of days. Glad you got back okay. ...
There was this duck that walked into a bar and sat down in a stool and the bartender said, “Can I help you?” The duck said, “Have got any grapes?” The bartender said, “NO! This is a bar and we don’t sell grapes.” The duck walked out and then he came in the next day ...
A blind man was out walking with his seeing eye dog when suddenly the animal paused and wet the man ‘s leg. Bending down, the blind man stretched out his hand and patted the dog ‘s head. Having watched what happened, a passerby said, “Say, why are you patting him? That dog just peed on ...
Why did the raccoon cross the road? He didn”t, he got hit by a car. ...