Having arived at the edge of the river, the fisherman soon realized he had forgotten to bring any bait. Just then he happened to see a little snake passing by who had caught a worm. The fisherman snatched up the snake and robbed him of his worm. Feeling sorry for the little snake with no ...
It’s a beautiful warm spring day and a man and his wife are at the zoo. She’s wearing a cute, loose-fitting, pink spring dress, sleeveless w/straps. As they walk through the ape exhibit and pass in front of a very large gorilla, the gorilla goes ape. He jumps up on the bars, holding on w/one ...
Pick up cat and cradle it in the crook of your left arm as if holding a baby. Position right forefinger and thumb on either side of cat’s mouth and apply gentle pressure to cheeks while holding pill in right hand. As cat opens mouth pop pill into mouth. Allow cat to close mouth and ...
1. I’ll turn capital punishment into a new game show! 2. I promise to get cocaine off our streets: 1 kilo at a time. 3. I’ll finish what Bill started — the interns. 4. Like father, like son. You liked my dad, right? 5. Vote for the GOP, Not OPP. 6. I promise no sex ...
Since I couldn’t find a good drinking game for the upcoming Presidential debates online, I decided to write one myself. There are three parts to this game. The first section applies to either candidate, and the next two are specific to John Kerry or George W. Bush. Part A – Either Candidate Have a small ...
The Godfather, accompanied by his attorney, walked into a room to meet with his accountant.The Godfather asked the accountant, “Where”s the three million bucks you embezzled from me?” The accountant didn”t answer.The Godfather asked again, “Where”s the three million bucks you embezzled from me?” The attorney interrupted, “Sir, the man is a deaf-mute and cannot ...
One day, a guy went into a store, just browsing.He suddenly saw a statue of a rat made of bronze, and thought that it was interesting. He decided to buy it, and so he did. The guy walked out of the store, carrying the statue in his arms. Suddenly some rats started following him.He shrugged ...
Two lawyers walking through the woods spotted a vicious-looking bear. The first lawyer immediately opened his briefcase, pulled out a pair of sneakers and started putting them on. The second lawyer looked at him and said, “Are you crazy? You’ll never be able to outrun that bear!” “I don’t have to,” the first lawyer replied. ...
Middle of the night, middle of nowhere, two cars both slightly cross over the white line in the center of the road.They collide and a fair amount of damage is done, although neither is hurt.It’s impossible to assess blame for the accident on either however. They both get out. One is a doctor, one is ...
What ‘s the definition of lawyer? The larval form of a politician. ...