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Archive for April, 2009

Microsoft ad space

· Posted in Computer Jokes

Microsoft announced that it is selling advertising space in the error messages that appear in Windows. Acknowledging for the first time that the average user of their operating system encounters error messages at least several times a day, Microsoft is trying to take financial advantage of the unavoidable opportunity to make an ad impression. “We ...

Computer Crashed

· Posted in Computer Jokes

My computer crashed and died today And I thought, “oh well what the hey” Now I”d have time to clean my house And see if I still had a spouse. It started out with weird frustrations Combined with mild heart palpitations And then my ankles began to swell Withdrawal symptoms from no AOL. Chills ran ...

Things You Don”t Want Your System Admin To Say

· Posted in Computer Jokes

1. Uh-oh… 2. Oh S***! 3. What the heck?!? 4. Go get your backup tape. (You DO have a backup tape?) 5. That”s SOOOOO bizarre. 6. Wow!! Look at this… 7. Hey!! The Suns don”t do this. 8. Terminated?!? 9. What software license?!? 10. Well, it”s doing SOMETHING… 11. Wow…that seemed fast… 12. I got ...

Program Manager

· Posted in Computer Jokes

A lead hardware engineer, a lead software engineer, and their program manager are taking a walk outdoors during their lunch break when they come upon an old brass lamp. They pick it up and dust it off. Poof — out pops a genie.”Thank you for releasing me from my lamp-prison. I can grant you 3 ...

Addicted To Computers

· Posted in Computer Jokes

‘Ten ways to know that you”re addicted to your computer:- 10) When you begin to laugh you yell, LOL. 9) You tell your computer you love it, more than you tell your spouse. Your house catches on fire and you run home to save your computer before your family. 7) Your computer is your ONLY ...

Environment

· Posted in Comedian Jokes

‘The EPA is conducting a $700,000 dollar study to see if Alaskan trees are polluting Oregon forests. You can tell Republicans are in power. “Pollution? It”s those damn trees.” Jay Leno ...

If Only Life Could Be Like A Computer

· Posted in Computer Jokes

If you messed up your life, you could press “Ctrl, Alt, Delete” and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on “run”! If you needed a break from life, click on suspend. Hit “any key” to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To ...

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