Funny Jokes Blonde Jokes

If you don’t want to give people a bad name, you will have your children illegitimately. ...

If you were orphaned when you were a child, I feel sorry for you, but not for your parents. ...

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey, sits down and orders a drink. Shortly after, the monkey starts jumping all over the place and acting crazy. The monkey grabs some olives off the bar and eats them… grabs some sliced limes and eats them… then jumps up on the pool table, grabs ...

James, as usual, came home really late one Saturday night after being at the bar all night drinking. Not only was he drunk, he was sloppy drunk. He carefully crept into bed next his wife, who fell sleep angry hours earlier, and gave her a goodnight kiss on the check in hopes that she wouldn’t ...

A young sailor was sitting in a bar having a few drinks when he looks over and sees a pirate. The pirate has a wooden peg-leg, a hook for a hand, and patch over his eye. Unable to resist, the sailor asks “How’d you end up with a peg-leg?” “I was swept overboard during a ...

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this: The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing. The fifth would pay $1. The sixth would pay $3. ...

A policeman pulls over a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow a breath into a breathalyzer. “I can’t do that, officer.” “Why not?” “Because I’m an asthmatic. I could get an asthma attack if I blow into that tube.” “Okay, we’ll just get a ...

Your mama is so dumb she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind. ...

Yo Mama so fat that when she wore hi-heels, they turned into flipflops. ...

Two rabbits were being chased by a pack of wolves. the wolves chased the rabbits into a thicket. After a few minutes, one rabbit turned to the other and said, “Well, do you want to make a run for it or stay here a few days and out number them?” ...